Thursday, February 2, 2012

15 Things that I Hope Won’t Be in the Before Watchmen Books

Hopefully DC shows some restraint and avoids the following:
1.      In the 1960s the Watchmen heroes and Charlton heroes team up to foil a plot by Moloch and Praying Mantis-Man
2.      Rorschach and Silk Spectre’s secret affair
3.      The person who killed the Comedian is revealed to be an imposter with the memories of the person they took over
4.      Dr. Manhattan is revealed to be an alien force of pure light who has the memories of Jon Osterman but isn’t him
5.      The Silhouette is tempted to heterosexual love by the original Nite Owl
6.      Ozymandias’ enhanced abilities prove to be the result of a deal be made with the devil
7.      The Comedian is revealed to have an evil twin brother. Whenever he does something questionable, it’s actually the brother
8.      The Vietnamese girl the Comedian killed is resurrected by her family as a zombie and sent after him.
9.      The Silk Spectre is impregnated by Dr. Manhattan but their baby grows quickly and heads to outer space
10.  The Silk Spectre is a murdered and becomes a literal spectre fighting crime like the Spectre for a time until a ceremony by Moloch and Ozymandias brings her back to life.
11.  We learn that Mothman was also attracted to Hooded Justice and what drove him mad was Hooded Justice’s affair with Captain Metropolis and subsequent death
12.  We learn that the real reason that Captain Metropolis was decapitated was another hero learned he was a vampire
13.  Moloch acquires a spell book that turns Nite Owl into an actual owl
14.  We learn that the real reason that the Screaming Skull reformed was he had an affair with the original Silk Spectre
15.  We learn that the real reason that Rorschach dropped Captain Carnage down an elevator shaft was that a previous blow to the head by Captain Carnage turned him sane for a while. He had to make himself insane again to do what was needed and resented Captain Carnage for this

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